Hey SEOs, what do you bench(mark)? Great marketing writing

Hey SEOs, what do you bench(mark)?

I thought this was just a great example of a well used clever metaphor in marketing.

Here's why it works for me:

 It's clear, clever, and thoroughly worked.  The punchline at the bottom "Don't sweat the decision - listen to the webinar now!" made me smile. Well done.

I could also list some emails in which metaphors are used and the result is confusion, distraction, and a general annoyance at the use of cliches and at poor writing.

BTW, we are NOT looking for help with SEO. Thanks anyway.